The âlap-bêt

The Syriac alphabet is easy enough; my problem is that it doesn't follow the Latin sequence.

Partly I blame the Etruscans. For instance: they didn't have a kappa, so just used the Euboean gamma in third place. Latin is Indo-European and absolutely does use a kappa as well as gamma. They put a diacritic on the Etruscan (false) gamma to make a hard G, keeping the Etruscan gamma where it is as the letter C. Meanwhile I take it that some Latins kept the K around, eventually sticking that approximately where the Greeks put the kappa.

The Etruscans also kept the digamma, F pronounced W - at first. Those tend to get turned into "f" sounds, or "v" if German. Meanwhile the Etruscans also had the upsilon which they just simpified to V, not unlike Greek cursive. No Italians wanted Φ. The Romans took the F, using the V as both U and W. All the latter of which, they dumped at the end. With Z, a letter the Romans and Etruscans both didn't use very much.

Meanwhile over in Greece the Athenaeans overlapped the Euboeans (and Thebans) for cultural primacy, especially under Alexander (a Dorian himelf). They certainly weren't going to bend to those jumped-up Gauls over in the bad part of Italy. Ditto the Canaanites and, oh look, I'm working with Syriac, whose Christian nations use a cursive of the Canaani alphabet.

So: how can a Gaul/German mutt like myself follow this âlap-bêt. Mnemonics?

How about: first, ABGDH[digamma], not unlike Greek. Then, since we already did G: Z, and since we did H: hard Hêt. Next hard Têt. Then it gets back to JKLMN, German-style. Semkat interrupts; then 'Ayin which stands in for the Greeks' omicron. Then: P! and Sade interrupts (gah!). Finally Q-R-Sh-T.

Yeah, I don't rate this mnemonic as too helpful, either. At least the first batch of letters read like Shel Silverstein's ABZ Book, and then after the letter J it reads like Dr Seuss constantly interrupting to hype On Beyond Zebra. Why didn't some Semite just put all the S sounds together (including Z) at the end? or put 'Ayin up at the top or at least next to the G?

Probably the Semites didn't want to make life easier for us fur-wearing savages either. The Eastern Med would say we're the ones who suck at the alphabet.